I really should have known better. It wasn’t till last weekend when there was all the talk about food addiction and all that other fun stuff on Facebook and the SINS page that things really clicked for me and I got a clue.
There are times I go MENTAL with my diet. What I realized is that I’ve been creating a pretty much impossible standard for myself. And it’s been making it harder to stay Paleo and making me pretty crazy besides. I said a lot about “impossible standards” when I talked about the whole body image thing in my post “Body Image, Food Addiction and I’m Not Good Enough.” I guess writing that post made some of the crazy stuff I’ve been doing more obvious…
What RESULT are you after?
In Self-Help there’s a big thing about results. Anthony Robbins is HUGE on defining what result you want before you start anything. What result was I after when I started Paleo-style eating more than 6 years ago? HEALTH AND PERFORMANCE. My “result” wasn’t “I want to eat a perfect Paleo diet and be more perfect than anyone else at it.” That kind of self-righteous bullshit is reserved for vegans and vegetarians as far as I’m concerned 😛
I’m still blown away at times when I mention something like eating brown rice or goat yogurt on Facebook and have a bunch of people FREAK OUT about those foods not being Paleo. I mean, what are we trying to do here? Are we trying to “eat Paleo” as an end in and of itself, or are we after health and performance? If you have BETTER health and performance with a cup of brown rice a few times a week, then eat the damn rice! Are we trying to get through the Pearly Gates of Paleo Heaven or are we trying to LIVE and TRAIN and PERFORM?
On the flip side, nuts and seed make me feel like crap and I don’t digest them very well. BUT THEY’RE PALEO! “Eat meat and vegetables, nuts and seeds, some fruit, little starch and no sugar…” How canst thou forsake nuts and seeds? Blasphemy!!!!!!! Look at my RESULT. Do I want to follow the diet dogma or do I want HEALTH and PERFORMANCE? Avoiding nuts and seeds is getting me to my RESULT…
But, THAT’S not Paleo!!!!!!!!!!
Something that’s made me nuts about virtually every “diet community” I’ve been around is the dogma and near religion that a lot of people get into. As a community, I think Paleo has a few zealots but, overall, I think we have more of a “use what works” mentality than many other communities. Robb Wolf has played a large part in that because he’s a leading theorist and he’s also pragmatic, humble and willing to change course when he learns something new.
Our diet – call it Paleo if you must – needs to be a living, breathing and evolving thing. A diet is a lot more than a list of what you can and can’t eat. I think Paleo is the best map we’ve come up with to date but, IT’S STILL JUST A MAP.
Something I take regular flak on is my use of rice protein in my fruit smoothies and green smoothies – and my use of smoothies in general! But the damn things WORK for me! I know that Paleo man didn’t have a Blendtec – or an outlet to plug it into – but I DO and smoothies work for my body and where my life is at this moment.
As a side note, I think the people who are screaming the diet dogma the loudest are the ones who are most likely to be pulling down the shades and eating garbage when no one is looking. Let he who is without sin cast the first stone and all that…
The Other Side of Perfectionism
I’ve written a lot about eating organic, buying local and supporting small farms. This past week I realized – all of a sudden – that I had set some SERIOUSLY high standards for myself – and they were making it HARDER to get where I wanted to go. I’ve made it a point for most of the last 6 years to eat ONLY organic food. I’ve stayed as organic as I possibly could. I’ve also made it a point to eat only grass fed beef and I’ve tried to get raw dairy – and make my own yogurt with it – whenever I could. Beyond this, a goal of mine has been to – as I’ve written about – keep everything local.
So, here’s the standard:
- 100% organic food
- All meats organic and fed their APPROPRIATE diet – This means cows are fed grass and chickens are pastured and not fed corn or soy, etc.
- As much local as possible – This is somewhat achievable spring and summer, but in the winter in New England it’s a lot harder.
- I’ve avoided seasonings other than Celtic sea salt and organic pepper for most of the 6 years. I really did my best to enjoy the natural flavors of things.
And Then I Started Missing the Mark – A LOT
I actually managed the above pretty well. Yeah, one of my staples is pasteurized goat yogurt and the organic whole chickens I get from Whole Foods are fed soy, but most everything else has been on track for the most part. But I wasn’t very hungry for the foods I was “supposed to” eat. Or, I’d start hungry and a few bites in be struggling to get it down. I could look at this as a moral failing – and I’m sure plenty of others would LOVE to as well. But I tend to look deeper than the surface of things…
My Breakthrough
The problem with having perfection as a standard is it’s REALLY easy to NOT meet it. That’s what was happening to me. When “grocery shopping” means a 30-45min drive to the nearest Whole Foods or paying WAY too much at the little local health food store and not having a great selection – it was getting pretty hard to stay 100% clean.
Add to that, I’m preparing ALL of my food myself and it was getting out of hand. I don’t mind devoting a lot of time to my eating and diet, but it was becoming somewhat impractical and some part of me was becoming more and more resistant and resentful.
And then there were those days when I was completely exhausted mentally and physically and said: “Fuck it, I’ll just order a pizza!” And, the reasoning goes, if I’m breaking my diet I might as well have a few Kit Kats for dessert. Oh, and I’ll have pizza left over tomorrow so I might as well “relax” tomorrow too… And we’re on our way down the slippery slope to mediocrity BECAUSE WE WERE PURSUING PERFECTION AND IT WASN’T REACHABLE AT THAT MOMENT.
Making it Practical
This weekend I went to Stop and Shop and – horror of horrors – bought two of their own rotisserie chickens. Not organic, not cooked myself. They even had some cornstarch and sugar added. Now, this IS NOT the way I want to eat. I’m still on the organic, local, humanely raised thing. It’s what I believe in and what I value. But I also have had to embrace the UTILITY of driving 5 minutes down the road and getting a hot, ready to eat chicken once in a while when I don’t have the time or energy to cook AND I’M HUNGRY. It’s a MUCH better option than driving 5 minutes down the road for a pizza.
Basically, what I did is give myself a “middle option” between cooking an organic, pastured chicken myself and ordering a pizza. How about eating chicken that may not be the quality I’d really prefer? That non-organic chicken is going to be a hell of a lot less harmful than a freakin’ pepperoni pizza!
Making Things Taste Good Again
This past week I’ve been really thinking about the food addiction topic. One of the reasons I think a lot of crap food is SO addictive is the seasoning. They’re really good at doing stuff to that food to make it taste good and keep you coming back for more. But the need for new and different tastes is a natural human thing – and probably evolutionary at that. And wars have been fought over spices throughout history, so it’s a good bet that we humans are pretty into them.
Last night I ate chicken, roasted veggies and bacon. All topped off with some Tabasco Sauce and Bone Suckin’ BBQ Sauce (I use Bone Suckin’ because it’s not only AWESOME but it’s one of the few that’s gluten and refined sugar free). And it was delicious! I ate and ate and ate! And this was the same meal I didn’t even want to finish the night before – without the sauces.
You STILL have to work, Pumpkin…
At this point, I’m sure someone out there is saying: “He’s right! I’ll just eat whatever I want! I don’t want to be a perfectionist!” That’s NOT what I’m saying! What I AM saying is that perfection is an impossible standard. Let’s go for OUTSTANDING and keep focused on the RESULTS we want to achieve.
ttys
Adam
Bravo! The concept of “perfection” is in fact what makes a dogma — virtually any dogma. Each of us needs to use what works for us as individuals. Paleo works for me because it helps me to avoid gluten grains; however, the occasional serving of rice, potato, or corn doesn’t bust the whole thing wide open. And I love corn on the cob, especially in the fall when it’s in season.
Similarly, just because something is “allowed” on a plan, doesn’t mean it’s “mandatory”. So nuts and seeds don’t work for you? don’t eat them!
I do my best: I found a source for grass fed beef, and I plan to buy it, but not often as it’s expensive. My eggs are from hens fed grains, but they are available and half the price of the other eggs — I have to go for the one that is within reach. I eat organic produce, wild fish, fruit, berries, etc. If I make more money, will I change my patterns? Maybe. But I have to go with what is attainable now, call it good, and move on with my life. With gratitude! Always. 🙂
Adam,
Thank you for this well-written, honest and timely post. I’ve noticed in the last few months a polarizing trend in the Paleo/Crossfit community, with the Paleo/Crossfit zealots on one side and the realists on the other. I am definitely on the side of the realists.
Coming to this only recently from a typical American diet/lifestyle, I have so far lived strict paleo and just about every level in between. Somewhere in there is the right balance for me, and it is up to me—AND ONLY ME—to find that balance. No one else lives in my body or deals with my life, so no one else can or should dictate to me what I should be doing for optimum health or performance.
I agree that an element of the religious exists within the community, and it is a major turn-off for me. In fact, I read a post yesterday that was actually addressed to “Paleo Evangelists” and many comments were geared toward how to “convert” family and friends (these are not my words, they are direct quotes). Seriously?!?
I just want to eat the best diet I can find and afford, participate in the best and most fun fitness activity available, and move toward the best me I can be. If I focus on those things I know I will come out ahead.
Keep up the good and realistic work!
darc
Thanks SO MUCH, Darc! I’m glad you liked it and it was timely for you!
Comments like yours make this whole thing worthwhile for me 🙂
Adam
I love this post. I’ve been paleo 5 months and have made great gains in physical and mental health. I buy as organic as I can but I live in an expensive city and I have a lbm of about 205- do the math and figure out how much organic grass-fed protein is needed to keep up with my active lifestyle. So I buy lamb in a regular grocery store, “smart chicken”, and farm-raised fish and supplement with some fish oil. It’s been working for me but reading some paleo sites, I makes me feel like Im doing it wrong. Sometimes I feel like the bar is set too high for entry for most ppl when just the base changes without everything organic and grassfed will have excellent results for everyone. I’m switching my retired parents over to a paleolithic lifestyle and it’d be impossible to do without making some concessions as far as organic meats and such go being that they’re on a fixed income. Anyways, this post is right on time.
Thanks a lot, Derrick! I really want to believe the Paleo community will stay on track and stick to what works and give the best results for the time, energy and money involved as opposed to creating another “Dietary Religion.” Time will tell, but I think the majority of us are on the “practical” side of Paleo.
Thanks again for the comment!
Adam
Honestly, I think I keep breaking Paleo because strict 100% Paleo makes me remember how i ate when I was anorexic. Thats perfectionism over my diet scares the shit out of me. I’ve been eating nuts lately but now I have 3 inches of belly fat to lose. Obviously, for me, my body doesn’t process nuts and seeds well at all. I’ve also wondered about some grains, as i know that I was leaner and meaner with a bowl of oats every now and then.
But I keep trying to stay strict, and the more I try the more I fail. And when I fail I fail big time with sugar laden crap which I don’t like to eat and that gives me migraines and I have no idea why. NO idea. I don’t even like the taste of sugar (I never have, even as a kid I would take savory over sweet).
SO now I am in a state of ‘I dont know what the hell to do’
Lani, In your case it sounds like you have multiple sensitivities to some non-Paleo stuff. If it were me, I’d try strict Paleo and then introduce one non-Paleo thing at a time. Not making yourself crazy with rules is one thing, but eating stuff that you’re allergic too is something else entirely. Gotta find what you’re sensitive to and avoid or minimize that.
Adam
Hey Adam,
I’m relatively new to the paleo/XF community, and this post couldn’t be more right-on-the-money for me. I find that it’s easy (and common?) to have perfection as a goal, but it never works because the second you start trying to live up to those (impossible) expectations, you fail. It might be a personality thing, but the all-or-none mentality has done me in countless times. I’ve been dairy-free and GF for almost a year now, but was only able to actually adopt that way of eating once I cut myself some slack. The bottom line: we’re human.
On another note: as a scientist, I can say that while we like to think we have everything figured out, the truth is we don’t, especially when it comes to diet/health/nutrition. Paleo comes pretty dang close, I think, but nevertheless we are complicated creatures, living in a very stressful (and unnatural, if you will) environment. All I’m saying is that flexibility and practicality in a ‘diet plan’ is paramount, because – as you correctly emphasize – the point is health, not being textbook 100% Paleo.
Anyway, excellent post for a newbie and VERY much appreciated 🙂
–
k
Glad you liked the post, k! I’m a scientist myself and I’ve talked about some of the implications of that here: http://adamfarrah.com/where-did-the-science-go
We can all see what being “textbook” and dogmatic did to veganism. Not thanks!
Thanks again for the comment!
Adam
i definitely hope so, adam. i feel we should be going by what your body is responding to at the moment and keep in mind that we’re trying to get the health benefits of the ancestral diet in a modern context, not trying to make a duplicate copy of their diets. i think as more studies are specifically done on it, we’ll definitely know what parts of the ancestral diet where the more health benefits derive. i feel fine if i make a whey protein shake with whipping cream and some fruit(sooooooo not paleo) but nuts make me gain weight and feel funky. over thanksgiving i ate well but didn’t touch any grains because i know that they make me feel like crap, not because i’m paleo orthodox. it’s about how stuff makes me feel these days while sticking to the big principals of no grains, no refined sugar and no vegetable oils. though he doesn’t bring the science geek part of paleo as well as robb, harris or cordain, i think sisson has a pulse on people’s hunger for practical solutions to this diet and i think his 80/20 principal is a good one to follow for alot of people.
Derrick, if you can do 80/20 then more power to you! I can be pretty lax about eating a lot of fruit year-round but grains are pretty much always a problem. If they were less of a problem, I’d eat more of them. The reason I love Paleo is that – for just about everyone – the problem foods are usually the non-Paleo ones. But, to your point, if you can do it 80/20 or 90/10 and live that way you’re in good shape!
Thanks again,
Adam
Wow, not to jump on the band-wagon, but a timely post for me too! I fell into the pizza and fish and chips trap over the last couple of days (easier since friends were over / laziness) but today is a new day! I eat paleo as much as I can without stressing about the occasional serve of brown rice with a good lot of stirfried veggies. People should be interested in their health, not just adhering to a set of standards. 80% paleo works for my body. As much as i love and agree with the paleo ideal, I won’t compromise the way my body feels and works just to satisfy the extreme end of the paleo spectrum. Thanks for the reminder to pull myself out of my take-away rut!!!
Yeah, it can be tough for sure. But adding the stress isn’t very good for your cortisol levels! If you can LIVE on 80% Paleo that’s a better deal than 30 days at 100% and never doing it again!
Glad you liked the post!
Adam
i have been studying foods, nutrition, and herbology for 15 years now. there are many diets out there that are paleo or a slight variation of paleo. i started eating one of them for my immune system. the major difference was that it included unsweetened REAL yogurt (there are ancient societies that had notable longevity eating yogurt). keeping the inflammatory response in the body under control works. i am a totally different human being when i eat this way and feel so good that i prefer it. the trick being that i know what works for me! when my husband came home and said he would like to eat paleo i thought “that’s easy!”, and it was. it wasn’t until this time that i started calling how i ate paleo, mostly because the group of people that we associate with recognize the term. we think of it as eating clean and we stay WELL and have incredible recovery time. being successful at eating right for me, i’ve noticed a few things watching others TRY to be successful at this diet. one thing is that people complicate it by trying to portion. if you break into ZONE for a rest day from the ridged routine, then portion, but other wise it is unnecessary. next, there are foods that are not allowed on paleo that have benefits far outweighing any derogatory effects. stevia (has a balancing effect on blood sugar)and xylitol(kills bad bacteria in the digestive tract) are great to help you through this diet! the last thing i would like to mention is food source supplementation. this is the biggest single key to success. if you have cravings your body is telling you that there is a deficiency. our soils are depleted and we get little to no enzyme content in our food no matter what you eat! believe me you have deficiencies, and as a paleo eater silica is probably one of them. address these things and your conscientious food choices will work!
Thanks for the thoughtful post, Kim!
Adam
You know what really messed up veganism? It wasn’t scientific at all. There’s no scientific basis whatsoever to say that veganism’s a healthy diet for *anyone.* Not dogma, just fact. The more I read about the effects of missing out on nutrients found only in animal foods the angrier I get that anyone’s taking veganism seriously.
Exhibit A: vitamin A. It’s coming out more and more that there are people unable to convert enough beta carotene effectively enough to live on that as their source of vitamin A. Now, whether that’s connected with chronic diseases of civilization or not, I don’t know and it really isn’t relevant; the diseases are *here* and we have to learn how to cope with them, because even if you’re a type 2 diabetic and have your disease symptoms completely under control, the underlying structural damage is still there and you still can’t convert beta carotene. This matters, because chronically ill people are still having kids, and the embryo desperately needs vitamin A for all sorts of developmental processes. Eyes, brain, body symmetry and kidneys are all developmental issues that are governed by vitamin A. Babies and very young children can’t make the conversion either so it’s not a stretch to say that neither can embryos or fetuses. I’ve heard it said that kidney defects are one of the most common types of birth defects in the developed world. Oh look, I heard right:
http://www.merckmanuals.com/home/sec23/ch265/ch265c.html
And how many asymmetrical people do you run into in your daily routine? I mean, noticeably asymmetrical, something you couldn’t avoid noticing?
How many heart defects? I seem to recall the development of that organ’s governed by vitamin A also.
Exhibit B: vitamin K. You can’t get the best form of vitamin K from plants. If your gut flora is screwed up, and most of ours happens to be, you’re not getting much K from your gut flora either. That leaves animal foods. Going back to fetal development, vitamin K carries a good chunk of the responsibility for how the face develops. If you had to have orthodontic braces as a child, or if you didn’t have room for your wisdom teeth, your mom could have stood to eat more vitamin K-containing foods. That sure was the case with me.
Exhibit C: choline. A lot of people are blaming fatty liver, which contributes to cirrhosis, heart disease, and diabetes, on vegetable oil and fructose consumption. Turns out studies are showing that this happens most often when the diet is deficient in choline. Guess what two of the top three choline sources are? Liver and egg yolks. Wheat germ comes in at #2 as far as we know (this one’s not been studied extensively yet), but wheat comes with its own set of problems.
And there’s more in that vein… those are three I can think of off the top of my head. If the science supported being vegan long-term then I could chalk it up to personal preference differences and not care who eats what. But when the science is saying this is a bad idea, and people are pushing it as healthy anyway, I have to take exception even if I sound dogmatic in the process.
I daresay they sound so dogmatic because all that malnutrition is messing up their brains…
Great post, Dana! Thanks for adding it! What’s unfortunate is that, even though real science doesn’t support vegetarianism, popular science promotes it. Until that changes I think we’ll still see people eating “low fat” and “avoiding animal products” and thinking it’s healthy.
Thanks again for the thoughtful post!
Adam
adam, i haven’t done grains in the five months since starting paleo. my 20 comes in more with the dairy and occasional whey shake. everything else is pretty strict. so maybe i’m 90/10? i feel too good without the grains and sugars and processed oils to ever really go back. my body would not be amused
PS that “where’d the science go?” post is what made me become a regular follower of this blog. i sent that out to all of my friends… keep up the good work.
@ Adam: “…the stress isn’t very good for your cortisol levels…” This is such a great point! My goal, over time, is to try and eliminate the stressors in my life. Those who want to berate me for not being “strict” paleo only add stress. I don’t need it OR them.
Hey Alison! Thanks so much for the comment! Sorry it was a “negative” that brought you out of your “box” and got you commenting 🙂
I give EVERYONE crap at one time or another – I try to be egalitarian with my sarcasm. I probably do give vegans and vegetarians a harder time than most, though. You guys make easy targets 😛 The truth is we can all eat whatever way we want. And, yeah, there are people in the Paleo community who are a pain in the ass. I’ve ranted about them before. If I have any issue with vegetarian or vegan diets it’s that we’re TOLD they are healthy and are the standard we mortals should live up to. Like the Dr. Oz episode where he took the 400 pound cowboy off ALL meat and had him eating soy chicken breasts and soy burger patties. Eat what you want – it’s a free country – but let’s be realistic about the health implications about diets with no animal products.
You obviously understand your body and your diet and are upfront about your nutritional needs and possible things to watch out for. I just get frustrated when someone like my grandmother avoids real butter and uses spread in a tub because the people on the news told her animal fat is bad for her – in the meantime she’s on a bunch of meds and makes a trip to the ER every so often. Eat what you want, but let’s keep the facts straight about things like margarine and imitation soy “meat!”
I’ve said it before: I’ve learned a lot from vegans – particularly the raw wackos 😉 I just did a post about green smoothies and referenced two vegan authors (or, maybe one vegetarian and one vegan). If you read the Bruce Lee quote at the end I think you’ll appreciate where I’m coming from.
Actually, I’m willing to bet if ANYONE connects to opposite communities like vegan and Paleo on some level – in the long term – it’ll be me. I’ve often said that Paleo is basically raw vegan plus meat. And I did try raw vegan – for a few days before I went nuts.. LOL I REALLY do think we can all learn from each other if we stop criticizing and yelling at each other for a few minutes.
Thanks again for the comment and for letting me know your thoughts!
Adam
Awesome, Alison! I guess I didn’t know that about Europe being less “fat-phobic” than most here in the US. It’s disturbing here!
I think you’re right also about the TYPE of vegetarian diet you eat. MANY people here in the US eat ANYTHING as long as it has no meat and call themselves “vegetarian.” Like avoiding meat is healthy and you can eat all sorts of junk and vegan cakes and cookies and be “healthy.”
Have fun with your goal writing and I’ll talk to you soon! Thanks again for the great comments!
Adam
I know what you mean about not handling some paleo foods. I can’t eat broccoli, kale or green beans. All firmly paleo.
Nicole, you’re absolutely right. That’s why I say over and over again that you can’t just have a list of “Paleo” foods and think you have a diet. You need to individualize it.
Nice going that you know that stuff doesn’t work for you!
Adam